Hey everyone! I would really appreciate some feedback and results on this survey I made for this same class as what inspired me to start this livejournal.
It won't take long and maybe you'll learn something about yourself too!
http://www.misterpoll.com/polls/333935
Thanks people.
and everything is going great! I'm working everyday on my tolerance of others and heir opinions. I realized one other thing that really bugs me too. when I try to debate my opinions with my mom, she always backs down. And she does this even quicker when I say thinks like "I understand what you are saying; have you thought about this...?" It makes me feel really mean and like I'm talking down to her (she accuses me of it alot) when I'm really not. She just walks out of the room.
I really don't want her to think that I'm not understanding or open to her opinion. I can accept hers and still have mine; agree to disagree- right?
Anyway, I'm excited to graduate next month and everything leading up to that is going great! well...go take that poll!!
muah!
My tolerance rating from the baseline period (6.5- remember?) rose to 7. That's pretty cool to think that paying attention to one element like that while keeping everything else in focus really can make a small change. Maybe it's just the attention given, but I flet so much happier and more focused on fixing things or preparing for the future by my actions today. I still enjoyed everyday and lived each one to the fullest. Actually, I won't lie, the days themselves felt longer (and fuller) each day. But it's getting late and so I will conclude here.
Much love
Susan
Again, due to being very busy, I neglected to post. However, I was keeping track with pen and paper... here it is:
Friday, March 28th, 2008
What went well today:
1) Surviving another day without my laptop. It's very hard when I have become so accustomed to it in my heavy-notetaking classes. But I druged thru it.
2) Surviving another day at work! I'm getting a little scared with how our business is dropping off so quick. It seems real bad for this time of year and they have been cutting hours. Also, there's someone who really gets on my nerves sometimes and they don't even know it. Just little things about how I'm approached when told to do something or delegating a task to me (when I am busy) that this person is perfectly capable of doing (both time-wise and ability). I need to be careful what I say since I don't want anything to come back at me for any reason.
3) My boyfriend coming to visit at 2am. Haha, I guilt-tripped him into leaving his apartment at 12am and driving 120 miles to my room...I really appreciate everything he does for me, even though I am 2nd to the NCAA right now.
Tolerance Rating: 7.0 - My mom and I discussed how some of my opinions on religion and the south affect her when I mock, joke around, or express them negatively. I tried to explain to her that underneath what I say, I really do think "to each their own". But she expressed to me how much she sometimes gets offended by it, despite how joking it may seem. It's hard though sometimes because the people that have the opinion I am "mocking" have lately been attacking me and can speak their opinions so loudly and directly. I tried to explain how hearing fellow studnets have their relationship be called a "sin" is hurtful and so if I offend the actual wrong-doer....too bad. But that's who my anger is directed towards, not innocent bystanders. I'm all about religions, spirituality, etc. Just don't insult me or I will insult you. Fair is fair, right? But this made me realize how intolerant I probably come off and I need to try and sand those rough patches down on my personality...
Saturday, March 29th, 2008
What went well today:
1) Talking more with my parents about moving. That's always a good conversation right now. We're agreeing on a lot, so yea... it's easy
2) Great quality time with my boyfriend. Need I say more? Oh, and we were home alone all night for once... Never forget what we talked about in Dr.Blundor's class.
3) RELAXATION. yes...another great thing that was a great part of this day.
Tolerance Rating: 8.0 - Nothing really happened today to shake my tolerance, not that I remember at least. I probably got irritated at work over something; hence the minus 2.
Sunday, March 30th, 2008
What wen well today:
1) SLEEPING! We spend almost the whole day completely lethargic. I loved it.
2) Studying. Got another decent chunk of my experiment set up. That's going to be run on Tuesday....eek!
3) Eating, and attempting to be healthy. The only meal I ate today was healthy. But my snacks of ice cream, 2 bites of cake and some bread were not healthy... oh well...
What I am grateful for:
1) My future. The more I think, the more I hope...the more I like...
2) My boyfriend. I'm sure I've written about him before in previous entries...but every day I am more and more grateful
3) My motivationg coming back! Easter weekend killed my motivation...but it returned this weekend
4) My financially supportive parents.
5) My friends that always know what I need.
Tolerance Rating: 10.0 - Nothing happened to shake my tolerance of others...but it could have easily happened. I spent all day at home with my boyfriend and we could have easily gotten bored and restless and got into an argument. I see others do that all the time....
- Location:At the desk...like always
- Mood:
creative
1) My morning with the kids. Every Thursday, I go to a local elementary school. Today was a lot of fun with the kids and the girls there delightful. Seeing them each Thursday has been so uplifting.
2) Getting some work done on my research. For one class, I have a lot of finishing touches to do and I got a decent chunk out of the way today.
3) NOT spending ridiculous money. That was a very difficult one. I wanted to spend a lot today because with the nice weather I wanted new clothes! But I resisted, even while one of my friends was shopping! Go me!
Tolerance Rating: 10.0 Yes, I think I was the most tolerant person possible today. And this was for one main reason. There was a CLEARLY intoxicated driver at the Zaxby's drive thru in front of me. Her reactions to everything were beyond delayed; especially when she hit the pole leaving the drive thru. But I did not get angry at her, although maybe I should have because of how she was endangering so many people. Instead, I put myself on guard and didn't take my eye off of her when she was in traffic ahead of me. I also told the drive-thru attendent, "That right there is the best evidence without getting someone hurt about why you shouldn't drive and drink." I do not know what crisis (if any) was going on in that woman's life, but I didn't react to her personally. Instead, I did the best I could to prepare for her actions. That took a LOT of tolerance and patience, believe it or not.
- Location:en mi casa
Today...this stuff went well:
1) My cognitive psychology exam. I definitely kicked that exam's butt. anything less than a 90% and I will be furious. Honestly, anything less than a 95% and I will be shocked. No joke, I'm that good when i prepare two weeks in advance
2) Eating (semi) healthy. Of course, I had my slip up at dinner when my dad and I went out because mom is out of town. We really need to stop going out...but, i hate our home cooking. it has no flavor or spice. BUT, hopefully, the herbs I bought today at school (Farmers Market <33) will help that problem out.
3) Dealing without my laptop in class. I feel so crippled without it, i'm not going to lie. I didn't realize exactly how much better it is for me to listen and type my notes rather than listen and write them...i missed a bunch of notes. and they look so ugly too....but I got by in class and between classes.
Today's tolerance rating: 8.0 - Nothing really happened today that would seriously push my buttons. But when dad and I were discussing politics (which I hate doing because we have such different opinions on some things) we actually talked very rationally and took turns without yelling "SHUT UP!" or "Listen!!" It was definitely a conscious effort on my part; i'm not sure about his.
1) Stopping by UCP Easter Seals. I wanted to stop by and see if I could use them as a reference when I possibly apply at the UCP in Greenville. It was exciting to see how excited everyone (kids and staff) were to see me. I missed them all so much! And they said I could definitely use them as a reference.
2) Relaxing. Yes, that's something that today I want to consider as "going well". I could have easily spent the whole day stressed, but Jeff and I didn't. Just one small argument about food and nutrition.
3) Getting some work done. I didn't get that much done, just wrote for this paper. And I definitely need to get on task more, but this Easter weekend killed my motivation!!
Tolerance Rating: 7.0 - There was the small argument with Jeff that I could have easily been more tolerant and showed more respect for his opinions and ideas. Other than that small tiff, I was consciously able to be more tolerant of others.
- Location:in my humble abode....and my MESSY room
- Mood:
should be diagnosed with ADHD
Saturday March 22nd, 2008
Things that went well:
1) Having a good breakfast with my Dad and Jeff. We went to laterna's and talked about a bunch of stuff; school, work, future. It was very nice.
2) Leaving work on time, despite the option to work later. I probably should have because of the extra money, but i didn't want to because I like to enjoy my time with my boyfriend, since he came down this weekend. So I put myself first and left work at my scheduled time, even though all my friends there begged me to stay.
3) Finally watching a whole movie at home and enjoying it. For some reason, rental movies are a waste of money for my attention span! Especially when they will be watched on the little TV in my room. But I really enjoyed King of California!! It was definitely a good "stay at home" night.
Sunday March 23rd, 2008
This that went well:
1) Talking to my brother when he called Mom. I usually miss his calls. He's always so busy working on the oil rig that he doesn't call her often...but today I was really lucky and got to ask him how work was and how my wonderful niece Britney is doing!!
2) Talking to my mom's mom. I know, I should call her "grandmother" but....i have trouble with that because of how she's doing right now. I like to put a little distance between us. She called and she's doing well- talking with a heavily medicated slur, but seemingly happy. Sometimes, I wish I could solve all the problems in the world...but maybe 5 minutes of cheesy fake-happiness on the phone will make her day.
3) Again, relaxing at home. I love taking the time to relax in bed...it was nice.
I am grateful for:
1) My boyfriend's health because he narrowly avoided a head-on collision
2) My grandmother's (dad's side) health; she could easily have been like my mom's mom
3) My dad's health because since his surgery he's been doing much better
4) My parent's support; I will need it a lot in the coming months and years
5) My close friends at work or from working together...they are my main social interaction each week.
Monday, March 24th, 2008
Today, these went well:
1) Figuring out exactly what to do about Jeff's tire problem resulting from the weekend. It took all day and required class time that I really didn't want to donate...but it needed to get done in a timely manner.
2) Attempting to fix my laptop. I didn't quite figure it out but it may have been beyond my basic knowledge. I did make a very good attempt and hopefully everything will come back okay.
3) Attempting to control my mood swings. Right now, I've been very... mood-swingy.... and this morning I had it well controlled until I snapped about my laptop problem. I did try and eventually, I got over it. It did take some walking around in the mall though.
1-10 Rating for today: 5.0 because I did have some rough times, but I was mostly tolerant of others...
1) Preparing for the Big Move. While mom was clothes shopping at JCPenny, I decided to use the time a little wiser and start a registry so I can keep track of what I like at JCPenny. They have the most reasonably priced stuff for my new townhouse/apartment/condo whenever that comes along.
2) Work. It always goes well, so it's not like that's anything too new. But today I really don't have a single serious complaint about anything or anyone. It just went smoothly.And we had a great crew.
3) Taking something "bad" and making it better. My family is getting new puppies this spring and next weekend we were all supposed to go visit the breeder and look at the litter. I wanted to go sooo bad, i'm really excited. But....i got scheduled to work. At first i was kinda upset...now i'm realizing that means i FINALLY have a whole evening where the house is mine... i have never ever had that situation in my 21 years of life... haha....we'll see what crazy stuff goes down....
pze out
- Location:In my bed with the boy
- Mood:
being touched with love - Music:NCAA Villanova vs. Clemson on ESPN
Things that went well today:
1) The long car trip to Greenville with Mom. Sometimes two women shouldn't ride in a car together for almost 3 hours (one way) and then try to discuss condos and townhouses or apartments... but today, that trip went fairly well. There were a few spats due to driving issues... on her part of course, not mine.
2) The kids @ the elementary school. Today all the girls I work with wrote about me during "journal time". I thought that was adorable and it really made me happy. They're great and always reminding me why I want to work with kids.
3) Talked to my boyfriend about his spending. It's hard when a relationship starts to get tangled with money. I strive to keep them separate but I'm a very giving person. And he's definitely taking more than I'm receiving back (money-wise) at this time. But... I told him my concerns in a very civil and loving matter. I like the fact that we don't argue and fight like other couples, I really don't want that to ever change.
That's it for tonight....love you peeps and tune in tomorrow night for another breather
What went well today:
1) Being able to hang out with a friend. I love spending time with people who are relaxing yet fun...and interesting. she definitely is a great, down-to-earth person and I love spending time with her to catch up on our lives.
2) Looking Good. Not that it's something I really worry too much about, but it's nice to dress up every now and then. It's something that makes me feel good and when I get compliments on these days...that's nice too.
3) Focusing on the moment; being mindful. It's hard at this point in my life to not focus on the future too much or dwell on the past in excess. I always want to look back at where I've been and then look out to where I'm heading. It's always good to keep those in mind, but obsessing on them is not wise. I was able to effectively keep myself in the moment today without too much focus on 10 years from now.
again, much love as I sign off for the evening...
1) Helped someone feel better. I don't want to mention who by name because I don't think that would be professional. But let's just say there was someone I knew was dealing with a hard time. I planned and made an effort to make sure this individual took a few minutes today to enjoy the day. and to BREATHE. obviously, my purpose wasn't known. i didn't make it known. but it still worked.
2) My Community Health Class. That class can be *such* a pain sometimes. Seriously, I want to go crazy during the 2hr 45 min span of time because it's a 300 level class that is so basic I want to cry. It should be a 100 level, maybe they made a typo and it's supposed to be 103 not 301. I don't know. But it went well because I didn't feel like I was dominating the class too much or that I was being too quiet for my own comfort; both of which I can be guilty of and I need to balance.
3) Had a peaceful interaction with a certain someone. Sometimes I struggle a lot with people who have values that are much different than mine, unless there is a clear cultural reason for it. But as far as someone who is of the same age, race, socio-economic status to have opinions that are a complete 180 of mine and their reasoning to be much different than mine...irks me a little. But this individual has been a decent friend to me, although I would not trust this person 100%. She has pulled threw at times when I needed her and such. But I have issues with aspects of her lifestyle. We had a good conversation (via text messaging, if that counts?) today that lasted for a while; catching up on the past 3 weeks. And that made me feel good, to put aside my differences successfully. Hopefully I can continue with that.
One thing to work on for tomorrow:
Driving Stress. I feel it creeping up a little. It's been helping with the trinkets I have hanging from my rearview that serve as a reminder that I am in control of not only my car but my stress and reaction to others. If I choose to react defensively- that's my choice. If I choose to cuss and honk- another choice of mine. I just really want to not have driving/my car associated with a 10% blood pressure increase every day.
and so i am signing off...much love...
- Location:living room
- Mood:
tired
1) Exercising. I actually went to the Student Rec. Center and checked out what was in there. While there I also grabbed some workout papers with recommendations, etc.
2) Physio. Psych. Exam. Well, I think that went well today! I haven't received my grade back yet but I'm certain it's good. I prepared a lot for it and I have a good understanding of the class
3) Spanish Class. Just had a good class today, that's all. Had fun and such...
One thing for tomorrow:
-Study (A LOT and WELL) for my cognitive exam on wednesday night.
1) Chapel Hill's rejection letter. If they didn't reject me, my bills would be too high and I would be working far too much while going to school. Being a tarheel is probably overrated for my professional goals.
2) Sam forcing me to go out Saturday Night. Even though I was enjoying my night-in with my parents, it was good to get out and dance. The evening turned out great!
3) Jeff dropping his cell phone in the paint bucket. God, that's a hard one to say I'm grateful for...but it's definitely making me realize how much I love and miss him each day. I guess it also makes me see that I do take him for granted.
4) My dad's health. After his surgery the week before, I was worried about how things would turn out and everything. There haven't been any complications and he feels good. I am very grateful for that. Hopefully, we'll start working out!
5) The man at work that called me a Damn Yankee. I am very proud of where I am from, I was doubting that it still shows. I'm very grateful (believe it or not) that I still have that critical part of me shining!
These went well today:
1) Waking up on time after coming home really late. I didn't know if I was going to make it thru the day...but I did.
2) Work. There are times when I feel like I'm being pulled too much, but I was able to handle it without getting too irrate (internally, of course)
3) Going out to eat with Mom. Sometimes I feel like she is being really particular about my life or saying things that wouldn't make sense or aren't what I want to do (or the way I would do it). I was able to tolerate her opinions, different as they may be, and not put her down.
Tomorrow:
*I want to spend more time studying for my exams than I did today!*
Love you guys
</a>- Mood: tired
I thought for a while about how to tackle this one project that I was pondering in my head. Since it's the first running of the class, we have an almost uncomfortable amount of freedom with our assignments. I created this livejournal based on inspiration from a handout that gave ideas of small tasks to imrpove happiness/optimism.
Two of them were:
-Each week, write down 5 people/things you are grateful for (gratitude)
-Each day, write down 3 things that went well (optimism)
I tailored these ideas by adding one more:
-Each day, write down 1 thing to improve for tomorrow (outlook to future, I'm very future oriented right now and i <3 to-do lists!)
I feel as though I am a very optimist (without being too floaty) and hopeful person. One thing I noticed I need to work on is my TOLERANCE of others; mainly those who strongly oppose my views/values. I'm extremely open to cultural differences, but when those are put aside- I can be brutal to others. I think if I work on this aspect of myself, I would be much less stressful and even happier.
I baselined my tolerance rating for each day for a week (once I returned from Mexico). My end-of-the-day average was about 6.5 for that week one a 1-10 scale (1= least; 10= most tolerant). Not too bad, but I strongly value being tolerant of others. I want to get this up. That will be my focus.
After doing these daily entries in here for 1 week, I will measure my tolerance levels again for 1 week (while continuing to blog here) and see where I stand. Wish me luck.
- Location:my wonderfully zen room
- Mood: creative
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